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Is your anxiety leaving you feeling stuck? Do you wish you didn’t have anxiety? Does anxiety stop you from doing the things you most want to do?
I can so relate. I’ve struggled with Generalized Anxiety Disorder my entire life, but was only officially diagnosed with it last year. Until a few years ago, I had no clue how significantly I struggled with anxiety. I thought that everything I was experiencing was normal! But I’m so glad I found out it wasn’t.
I didn’t see how anxious I’ve always been until first learning I was on the spectrum a few years ago. Seeing the anxiety for the first time felt very validating.. but it was also very overwhelming. Because, how the hell do I deal with it now?!
That’s what I’ve been figuring out for the past three years. I’ve felt crippled by my anxiety more times than I’ll ever be able to count. I’m familiar with every kind of anxiety. Social anxiety. Anxiety over even starting the simplest of tasks. Anxiety about where I’m not yet, and how far I still have left to go.
I used to think my anxiety was all bad. I thought it was just something I had that sucked, and that I was going to have to learn how to manage. So, that’s what I did. I started finding healthy ways to manage my anxiety through outlets like meditation and mindfulness. It wasn’t until then that I truly saw all the positives of my anxiety and how I could actually use it for good.
And that’s what this post will focus on! Anxiety does really suck, but it’s not all bad. There are lots of cons to being an anxious person, but there’s also lots of pros that aren’t focused on nearly enough.
Here’s what you’ll Learn:
- Why I’ve learned to love my anxious mind
- 5 Ways that I use my anxiety for good
- My favorite coping strategies for managing anxiety
why I love my anxious mind
After realizing how anxious I truly was, I wished things could be different. I saw all the ways it had left me so stuck in my life… from being deeply anxious around everyone as a child, to leaving me paralyzed with overwhelming thoughts about starting even the simplest of tasks, like showering and brushing my teeth.
In my search for ways to manage my anxiety, I found meditation. I won’t go into meditation in this post (to learn more about the benefits of meditation for overactive minds, check out my blog post, Meditation for Overactive Minds: 10 Best Tips). But I will say that meditation helped me make peace with anxiety, plus a lot of my other shit.
It helped me stop judging my anxiety as good or bad. Once I did that, I was able to get more curious about it. I saw all the little things about me that make me me because of my anxiety. How I’m able to feel things so deeply and beautifully. My high level of empathy and understanding for people.. sometimes to an unhealthy extreme (I’m working on that). My strong attention to detail, and the conscientious drive I’ve always had to do the right thing.
Once I saw all of these things, I just knew I couldn’t wish my anxiety away.. even on the worst days. Because like it or not, anxiety is a part of me. That will never change, and I’m okay with that now. I recognize that everyone has struggles, and anxiety happens to be one of mine. And without it, I wouldn’t be me. I wouldn’t change that for the world, even if I could – and neither should you.
5 ways I’m using my anxiety for good
1. I look for what my anxiety may be trying to tell me.
Anxiety can be a pretty awesome tool for making positive life changes. You just have to know when to listen to it.
For example, last year, I recognized I had a lot of anxiety about my finances and lack of knowledge about money management. So instead of letting the anxiety take over, I used it to make positive changes. I read a personal finance book. Built good credit, opened a savings account, started contributing more to my 401K, and started tracking my spending. This year, I plan to open an IRA and begin investing. I’m expanding my side hustles and am focused on increasing my income as much as possible.
And to think.. all of these changes might not have happened if I didn’t have anxiety to kick my ass into gear! Fear is never a fun emotion to feel, but it can be an excellent motivator if you allow it to be.
Can you think of anything in your life causing you anxiety that might actually be telling you to make a positive change?
2. I use it is a reminder to live more fully in the moment.
One thing that sucks about being an anxious person is how often I worry that something horrible might happen. Whenever a family member or friend arrives later than expected, my mind immediately jumps to the worst case scenario.. did they get into a car crash or some other horrible accident? Did something else really awful happen?
Before I knew how to deal with my anxiety, I used to overwhelm myself with thoughts like this all the time. It became exhausting. It didn’t help that horrible things I feared would happen had actually happened.. like losing my dad at an early age.
There was a time in my life when I felt so overwhelmed by horrible thoughts of what could happen that I lost my ability to enjoy the present moment. But as I learned more about mindfulness, I realized something very powerful:
I’ll never be able to stop awful things from happening. Like it or not, they will still always happen to me and everyone else. That’s just this crazy, beautiful roller coaster called life. There will be times of light and times of darkness. So, why should I ruin all the good times by worrying about every thing that could go wrong?
Now, when thoughts like these come up, they serve as reminders more than anything else. Reminders to savor all the times of peace and happiness even more. To not put off the most important things to me, and to love and appreciate everyone in my life more deeply. Because, we truly never know what tomorrow holds. Right now is all we really have.
3. I use anxiety to be as safe and prepared as possible.
It turns out there’s another benefit to always imagining worst case scenarios.. you’re always motivated to take every possible precaution you can take to stop awful things from happening. If you’re like me, you imagine even the most unlikely of horrible scenarios and prepare for them.
When I take walks by myself, I don’t wear my hair in a ponytail because that would make it easier for someone to grab and attack me from behind. Before I get in my car, I check the back seats to make sure someone isn’t hiding back there. I’m extra cautious when changing lanes and turning. When I house sit, I give my mom the contact information for the people I’m house sitting for.. just in case something were to go wrong. I also repeatedly check to make sure all doors are locked and alarms are set.
Thanks to my anxiety, I think I make a pretty great house sitter.
4. I turn my anxious thoughts into positive energy that leads to even greater joy.
It’s so easy for me to get caught up in all kinds of anxious thoughts. Anxious thoughts of my future, anxious thoughts about whether I said or did the wrong thing in a social situation, and more. When I feel myself starting to slide into a deep anxiety spiral over those things, I remind myself of something very important:
Most of the things I’ve put so much time and energy into worrying about have never actually happened! I’ve wasted so much of my life being overwhelmed by so many things. And what do I have to show for it?
I thought about that a lot more. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how truly unproductive and draining all that anxiety is. Even after horrible things I feared happened, everything still worked out. Yes, I hurt and I felt loss – but I grew from those experiences and found beauty in them. And ultimately, I was still okay.
I still experience anxiety in all kinds of situations – like parking in busy cities I’m unfamiliar with and ordering food in loud restaurants. I’ve gotten so much better at navigating myself through all of these anxieties. Even though I feel anxious, I still do them. After their successful completion, the anxiety I felt before usually turns into an overwhelming sense of gratitude and joy for everything that went right.
5. Anxiety helps me get more done.
My challenges with executive functioning have made getting things done a lot harder for me. But, this is something I’ve worked really hard to get better at – and I’ve made a lot of progress.
My biggest challenges have been starting tasks, and successfully transitioning from one task to the next. Before I started improving my executive functioning, I often felt paralyzed in anxiety, and overwhelmed by it so much of the time. It’s like, I was stuck in anxiety, and didn’t know what to do next.
I’ve done lots of different things to help with this problem. But one thing in particular that’s really helped, has been asking myself, “What’s the next thing I should do that makes the most sense?”
For example, I’ve struggled with lots of anxious thoughts that come up during the day that have made it hard for me to structure myself and accomplish what I want to get done. Here’s what one of these anxious thought patterns look like for me:
“Oh no, I woke up later than I wanted. I should have been finished with my morning routine by now. If I start it now, it will take me at least an hour to officially start my day.. which will put me even further behind in starting my work. Shit. Now, I probably won’t have time to make dinner, workout, and get all of the other work done that I wanted to do. I wish I’d woken up earlier, now my whole day is shot.”
Those kind of thoughts gave me so much anxiety that I then had even more anxiety that left me feeling paralyzed. So paralyzed that the thought of starting a new task felt so overwhelming to me, which then caused me to waste even more mental energy feeling anxious about them.
Those experiences have been deeply painful and hard, but I’m thankful I got to experience them. I’m thankful because they’ve taught me to associate all of that nonconstructive anxiety with even more anxiety in the long run. Like, feeling trapped in my anxiety all day, then finally coming out of it, and then feeling anxious again because it’s 7pm and I’m only just starting my work. Or, taking a super long time to get out of bed, because of how overwhelmed I feel about everything I need to do that day.
Recognizing when anxiety is constructive and when it isn’t has been tremendously helpful for me. Now, when I feel myself starting to get lost in an anxiety spiral, I stop myself, and I listen. Even nonconstructive anxiety becomes constructive for me, because it helps me stay on track and avoid more anxiety.
I’ve been anxious about starting and completing tasks enough times to know that my anxiety usually goes away a few minutes after I start a new task. I’ve learned that I have the most anxiety at the thought of starting a new task. But once I force myself to actually start, that anxiety usually goes away pretty quickly. After accomplish one hard thing I was feeling anxious about, I’ve found that I’m more confident in my ability to get more done.. which then makes it easier for me to ignore similar feelings of anxiety for the rest of my day, and do even more things!
Other Ways i cope with anxiety:
my cat
This boy brings me such joy and laughter, just by being the lovable, mischievous little asshole that he is. He isn’t a cuddly lap kitty, but I don’t hold that against him. He shows me love in his own unique ways. Like, when he lets me hold him and feel his purrs for about 3 minutes before he gets really pissed.
medical cannabis
I got my Florida Medical Card a few months ago, and it’s been awesome! I’ve loved having safe and legal access to all kinds of different cannabis strains. While cannabis definitely shouldn’t be your only anxiety coping mechanism (I learned that the hard way), I think it works beautifully when used in moderation.
It’s important to note that cannabis affects every person differently. Personally, my body processes it really well. It slows my mind down at night, eases severe anxiety, and helps me get more in touch with my emotions. In fact, cannabis is what got me so interested in mindfulness in the first place.
I noticed how ‘in the moment’ I felt when I was high. When I realized I was using cannabis too heavily, I knew I needed to find other ways to create this same feeling. That’s when I started learning as much as I could about mindfulness!
If you’ve never tried cannabis before, I recommend doing it safely and starting out slow. You don’t know how it will affect you, and you don’t want to set yourself up for a very experience. For more smart tips on using marijuana for anxiety, check out this article by Healthline.
my magic weighted blanket
I’ve wanted a weighted blanket ever since I heard about them last year.. and this past Christmas, I finally got one!
If you don’t know, weighted blankets are blankets designed to create pressure around the body that feels very calming and soothing. They’ve been said to improve sleep and reduce anxiety because the pressure of the blankets make it harder for the body to move around a lot. This supposedly creates a feeling of security and warmth, and is advertised most often to autistic people, those with ADHD, anxiety, and sleep disorders.
So, of course I had to have one.. and so far, it’s helped so much! I’ve been sleeping so much better. The pressure of the blanket helps me feel secure and loved. The fact that a blanket can simulate the feeling of getting a real hug without needing a boyfriend is so fucking awesome.. and much more low-maintenance.
I got the six pound pink cotton blanket from Magic Weighted Blanket, because I was always bothered by the heat of heavy comforters, even though my body craved the pressure. They have all different kinds of weighted blankets available on their website!
craft projects
Crafting has long been a favorite therapy of mine. If I’ve been in an especially anxious period, I love setting aside time to craft by myself to recharge. Lately, building Christmas Putz houses has been one of my favorite craft projects to do!
To get the pattern for this adorable little house I made, click here.
journaling
I love all forms of journaling. I journal to stay organized, but I also journal just for fun.. as you can see. Creating artsy bullet journal pages like this is so fun for me – and it helps me keep track of important things I want to remember. I also have bullet journal pages like this for birthdays, shopping lists, recipes, and more.
If you have anxiety and haven’t tried journaling, I absolutely recommend it. I also set aside time to journal my thoughts in the morning before starting my day – this is my favorite way to use journaling to manage my anxiety.
ConClusion
I hope you found this post helpful – and I hope it’s helped you realize that while anxiety isn’t fun, it can be used to create a lot of good in your life and in others.
Is there a way that you’ve learned to use anxiety for a good that I didn’t mention here? If so, I’d love to hear what it is in the comments! And, if you loved this post, it would mean a lot to me if you shared it on Facebook or Pinterest.